originally i was going to title this entry "sexism" but i think the problem is much bigger than that. honestly, before i left high school, i never really thought about the way men treat women or women treat men. i mean, it wasn't really one of my biggest concerns at the time; i guess i just never noticed the difference before. but now the subject seems to be more and more obvious and increasingly confusing/frustrating for me, as it feels like an entirely new topic for me.
BECAUSE it feels so new and confusing (more often in a negative way), i haven't really formed a strong opinion on the whole subject. just bear with me here: without looking it up, think of YOUR definition of sexism. so when a man defends a woman in an argument BECAUSE she is a woman, is that not sexism? or when a man helps a woman with her load of work because the so-called lady "needs" help, is that not sexism? so if a guy treats me nicely or offers to help me out or anything like that just because i HAPPEN to be of the opposite sex, i never know if i should just accept the help and thank him, or if i should feel slightly offended because he is indirectly thinking of me as weaker.
because there is such a big difference in the ratio of men to women in my field, sometimes i can't help but let a little of the feminism come out. there was a time when i would enjoy the occasional sexual joke, and even partake in the joking; nowadays when i hear a guy tell a sexual joke in the kitchen it suddenly offends me, and even i am surprised at myself. because suddenly there is a BIG difference, and suddenly i realize i am no stranger to sexual harassment, and suddenly when i think of any male i feel slightly disgusted.
but i don't want it to be that way. i want to be able to meet a guy who i CAN'T think of as slightly repulsive. so why the FUCK is it SO HARD to find ANY guy like that when i'm practically surrounded by men/boys every day i go to school?! i mean, WHAT THE HELL?!! C'MON!! i don't want to be the feminist bitch in the kitchen (sooo cliche), but i definitely do NOT want to be thought of as weaker/less competent. if anyone can think of a solution for this, please, do share.
p.s. sorry for the little ranty-poo. obviously things have been getting a little weird for me lately, and when i say lately, i mean within the past year or so :/
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well i think being a "gentleman" is an indirect form of sexism. Indirect because as you claim and explained, it is still somewhat sexism.
ReplyDeleteI think that being a gentleman has become part of our culture that when it happens, we look over it and never think of it in a negative way. It's kinda like, whenever your family needs to go somewhere, your dad is driving instead of your mom even it's your mom's car he's driving. It's culture.
If you think about it, Breast Cancer fundraiser things are more sexist than your work place. Why? Because it MAINLY includes women (practically because it's more prevalent) but men can get it too. Sure they don't discriminate against men, but do you see any advertisements about Breast Cancer that has men in it?
Point Made.